Captian Fear
Pirate Master

1. Follow the rules
2. Be mature
3. Have fun
I'll go first. This story is about a friend of mine of whom I done this before:
Year 2083:
Jade Wildfury awoke at the Shady Acres Retirment Home in southern Florida with a crick in her neck. Struggling to grab her walker, she wobbled out the door.
"What time is it?" she asked a nurse.
The bored young lady, never taking her eyes of her magazine, mumbled "12:30."
"Oh my I'm up early," she said as she moseyed over to her lounge chair.
She looked on the old T.V. (just an HD plasma screen) and sighed as an old pirate movie played. Jade loved pirates. She was even one herself. In the 18th century she roved on her ship in search for Spanish loot. She would cut down enemies they were unfortunate to fall into her path. And one day she stumbled upon the greatest treasure of all...
The Fountain of Youth.
By drinking from the fountian she was given a longer life and the ability to stay young. The fountain had it conditions though. She had to come back every hundred years or so to become young agian. This work well enough until one fateful night half a century ago when she returned to a empty pool where the fountian use to be. Since then she grew older and finally had to accept her eventual death. Her red hair turned grey and her vibrant young body became old and wrinkled with time. She even noticed the enlargement of her backside.
So that is how she go here to this shabby retirment community. It was a nice place to live. There were water areobics and bingo every thursday night. And Jade herself was in charge of the local Story Sisters Society, a local group of ageing women that discuss the local soap operas that plague daytime television.
So as Jade sat on her giant behind, she quitely dozed off. She began to dream of her past years as a beautiful pirate. She was once again on her ship sailing towards the open horizon. She smiled but then the boat shooked. Dozens of light blue nurses invaded her ship and force her into a chair and spoon fed her oatmeal.
Jade woke with an alarmed snort. She sighed.
"Well at least my arthritis hasn't acted up yet... Oh wait, nevermind."