kill the person before

Ok, since Jack made a post that didn't involve killing... I don't know who to kill. So I'll kill both Will and Jack! :D

Will's Tragic Death: I point to a bird in the sky saying "Look, a UFO!" He looks and I stab him a thousand times with my dagger. Before slowly walking away, looking around, I steal his rum from his pocket.

Jack's Somewhat Tragic Death: I make him watch the Zhu Zhu Pets show while he's trapped in a cage, and he dies from its epic badness.
 
Has a nightmare where Freddy Krueger stabs Gastro with his razors and cuts him into peaces for writing so much in a simple game...Oops, it really happened.
 
points to a ufo and says " look its a bird " which gastro decides to attack when he attacks it made the ufo aliens very angry so they pick me up for protection and the aliens very vilontly destroy the earth itself ( mwahaha!!!... why am i so mean today?? )
 
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